And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
as a side note pls kill me
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
Is that strawberry winking at me??
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
