Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular
Wrong number and your a loser
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
Randomize
