idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
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