She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
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