Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
When he brought me into his room he showed me his James Bond calendar and matching sheets, and then told me that his goal in life is to be James Bond….epic fail. Mission Impossible. I was scared to take off his boxers to find out that they were also James Bond themed.
RUN LIKE YOUR JAMES BOND
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Randomize
