3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
Just chased the kids into the backyard with kitchen knives. Best. Babysitters. Ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
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