i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize