Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Randomize
