My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
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