you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
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