why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize