Texts From Last Night

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  (214): View more from Texas

  Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.

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  (214): Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever. http://tfl.nu/p67s
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  (601): View more from Mississippi

  I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.

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  (601): I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water. http://tfl.nu/8w2r
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  (305): View more from Florida

  absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.

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  (305): absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me. http://tfl.nu/yste
  Replies (8) Good night (729) Bad night (3725) Order T-Shirt
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  (314): View more from Missouri

  just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college

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  (314): just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college http://tfl.nu/eu7q
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.

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  (617): She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl. http://tfl.nu/oaik
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  (727): View more from Florida

  hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.

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  (727): hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week. http://tfl.nu/6l6t
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  (757): View more from Virginia

  you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.

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  (757): you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK. http://tfl.nu/qo45
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  (651): View more from Minnesota

  Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism

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  (651): Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism http://tfl.nu/8f4x
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  (443): View more from Maryland

  her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"

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  (443): her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does" http://tfl.nu/16y8
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  (386): View more from Florida

  It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.

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  (386): It's like God was speaking to me through a penis. http://tfl.nu/n7ui
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  (418): View more from Quebec

  I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out

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  (418): I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out http://tfl.nu/dee8
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.

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  (203): Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle. http://tfl.nu/td6t
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  (231): View more from Michigan

  I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.

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  (231): I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this. http://tfl.nu/nn25
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  (785): View more from Kansas

  I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.

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  (785): I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving. http://tfl.nu/gaew
  Replies (5) Good night (1245) Bad night (224) Order T-Shirt
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  (704): View more from North Carolina

  "You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.

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  (704): "You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help. http://tfl.nu/s0yf
  Replies (17) Good night (574) Bad night (501) Order T-Shirt

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