Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
Bro, I met the coolest hottest chick tonight and she has the hottest friends.
Where are you?
Strip Club
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
Randomize
