i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
I stumbled in at 6am to find my cat in the window making a noise I've never heard her make. When I went to the window there was a goat outside staring at us.
Are you sure? Or did you just think there was a goat?
No there was a goat. I gave it a donut.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
Randomize