I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
she looked like the before picture.
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Randomize
