I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize
