Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
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