Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
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