you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
