i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize
