btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
I'm just going to tell you this I knocked up your girlfriend. I didn't mean to I thought it was somebody else I wasn't drunk but it was dark.
The truth is better her than my wife.
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