Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (810): View more from Michigan

  Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?

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  (810): Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you? http://tfl.nu/wjcf
  Replies (2) Good night (2732) Bad night (962)
• Favorite

  (501): View more from Arkansas

  He is like the real live version of the state fair..

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  (501): He is like the real live version of the state fair.. http://tfl.nu/cptf
  Replies (16) Good night (837) Bad night (2844)
• Favorite

  (773): View more from Illinois

  Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment

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  (773): Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment http://tfl.nu/rjpv
  Replies (13) Good night (5318) Bad night (896)
• Favorite

  (973): View more from New Jersey

  his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed

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  (973): his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed http://tfl.nu/wvyq
  Replies (59) Good night (13471) Bad night (2544)
• Favorite

  (615): View more from Tennessee

  She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.

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  (615): She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse. http://tfl.nu/chf5
  Replies (6) Good night (1170) Bad night (2380)
• Favorite

  (973): View more from New Jersey

  If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari

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  (973): If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari http://tfl.nu/13id
  Replies (22) Good night (1218) Bad night (2856)
• Favorite

  (678): View more from Georgia

  Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.

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  (678): Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch. http://tfl.nu/rrk7
  Replies (7) Good night (3009) Bad night (586)
• Favorite

  (714): View more from California

  When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.

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  (714): When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value. http://tfl.nu/r3cp
  Replies (16) Good night (795) Bad night (2976)
• Favorite

  (407): View more from Florida

  Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.

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  (407): Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time. http://tfl.nu/ap64
  Replies (4) Good night (726) Bad night (1377)
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT

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  (+44): He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT http://tfl.nu/lhny
  Replies (11) Good night (1834) Bad night (599)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes

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  (303): idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes http://tfl.nu/2i45
  Replies (2) Good night (1060) Bad night (685)
• Favorite

  (541): View more from Oregon

  Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.

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  (541): Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic. http://tfl.nu/b3rt
  Replies (1) Good night (924) Bad night (551)
• Favorite

  (620): View more from Kansas

  Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"

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  (620): Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner" http://tfl.nu/uhkx
  Replies (2) Good night (755) Bad night (343)
• Favorite

  (416): View more from Toronto

  well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself

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  (416): well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself http://tfl.nu/ylfg
  Replies (4) Good night (736) Bad night (358)
• Favorite

  (703): View more from Virginia

  Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.

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  (703): Today is an "outside sex" kind of day. http://tfl.nu/srl3
  Replies (3) Good night (930) Bad night (337)

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