Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
These Are 23 Of The Most Uncomfortable Questions You Can Ask
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
The 17 Most Horrible Things Said To Online Daters
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES