You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
And despite my lack of successful relationships I'm a fucking guru
That's like claiming you're a good coach but going 2-12 last season
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
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