Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
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