i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
Randomize
