I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
Is it because I queefed?
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
This house was built for laser tag.
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
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