I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
Randomize