Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
Randomize
