We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
So gin and wine won't be happening again
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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