He asked me if I "almost moaned"
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
Randomize
