Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
Randomize
