But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
Randomize
