i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
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