She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize