Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
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