break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
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I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
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He better not be in your backpack
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
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