quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth
Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again?
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
Randomize
