My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
and then I drunkenly screamed, "you can ride that Uber all the way to revenge city!"
which was funny until I realized I paid for my enemy's cab to go fuck my ex
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
Randomize
