do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
Randomize
