I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
did you just send me my own nude
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
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