Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
Randomize
