she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
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