if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
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I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
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