Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
So here's a brief summary of my weekend: last night I drank four glasses of Death Punch, grabbed the toaster, said "This is mine", put it in my pants and walked out the front door.
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
Randomize
