new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD