yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Randomize
