Your dad touched me again.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
Babe.. You are farting in your sleep and it literally smells like something crawled up your asshole and died.. I'm gagging and I feel like I'm eating your fart right now. I want to tape your ass cheeks shut and plug up that canon you call your ass. All I hear is snores and farts.. You are lucky I love you
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
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