It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
Randomize