You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
I am never drinking with the goths again.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
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